Last night’s ass-fucking …

Tags

anal sex, anal training, begging, deep throat, master/slave, oral sex, rough sex, terminology

… happened, again. He tried something new – ben-wa balls in my cunt, and then his cock in my ass. We had to stop that as it just was not. going. to. work. So then I think he felt a bit frustrated by that failure, and so when he fucked my ass, he was particularly vicious. First the pushy, demanding fucking with the head of his cock while I squirmed and squealed. Then, the ‘hold the troublesome girl in place’ position, with him poised above me, and then plunging directly in (with lube thank god) as deep as he could go in one fell swoop. May I add, that was bloody deep, and then as he really got into abusing my ass, it was all I could do to hold on for the ride.

As we lay cuddling afterwards, he told me I wasn’t getting the butt plug overnight. I begged and begged for it but he just wouldn’t. I may have pouted.

Oh and the evening started with a lot of throat-fucking. “To the back of your throat, slut.” So I did. “And out”. I followed all the instructions to the letter. When I pulled off choking and coughing, he gave me 2 seconds to breathe, then he grabbed a fistful of my hair and put me right back where I belonged, and held me in place just long enough to remind me. “I didn’t say stop, slut.”

Oh and I think I have to start using the term ‘pussy’ rather than ‘cunt’ as now he’s calling me a cunt, which may I say just makes my pussy juices flow freely, as I really get off on being reduced to that simple, greedy little hole of mine. Or really, it’s his, he owns this pussy, and when I asked if I could touch myself to sleep, of course he said no. It’s his, not mine.

Now tonight I’m going to sleep exhausted right now while he is out. When he gets home, I wonder what will happen. I’m way too tired and need my sleep, badly. However, he is my Master and if he wants to take my ass, … let’s wait and see shall we.

training me in a new oral sex position

Tags

bdsm, deep throat, oral, oral sex

tonight he came to bed, put in the butt plug, and then dragged me on my back til my head was hanging over the edge of the bed. i guessed what was coming and had my mouth open wide. he slid his cock into my mouth, down to my throat, pushed in pretty far, and then pulled out. then again, testing out the depth. then holding my head with both hands, he fucked my mouth in that position, me gasping and straining, him ploughing his cock into my throat.

a position i can’t remember the last time we did it. it’s hot because i feel like he’s positioning me purely for his pleasure, with absolutely no regard for me. he told me it felt amazing, and that i may as well get used to it now, because it’s going to be happening a lot.

why did i think i even had a say?

Tags

bdsm, deep throat, face fucking, fucking, gimp hood, hogtied, master/slave, obedient sex slave, oral, oral sex, restraints

… last night. he said he was going to let me sleep. i asked for play – but nothing too heavy.

so he put the hood on me. buckled in the penis gag. restraints on ankles and wrists. hogtied. stainless steel ass hook slid into me.

around the time he started hogtying me, i started fighting. fighting back because i knew i couldn’t win, but i needed to feel him bringing me to heel, exerting his control. i was pissed at him mildly for going straight to what i thought was heavy, right when i asked to not have it.

and i fought back. and he wrenched my limbs into position, buckled me up, and everything i did was useless.

which is precisely what submission is for me. whatever i try to do, is useless. so i end up giving up, abandoning any pretense at having a say in the goings-on. just admitting to myself that i am here to serve. to have it happen to me, not to decide what it is.

he kept me like that for a few minutes, then he released me, though he left the hood on. popped the gag out. pushed his cock into the small mouth hole, as much as he could. “there’s lots of pre-cum for you to clean off. get it done.”

i did, of course. i was so out of it by now, i was seeking any opportunity to obey. so when he told me to get on top of him and straddle him, to lower my body onto his cock, which is guaranteed to go deeper than just about any other position – i got up there, and sank down until i was whimpering, and then pushed even more. he loved this – he started ramming up into me and he drew me down to him, holding me tight, and fucking me over and over again. then flipping me over – i’m on my stomach, and he’s pinned my arms behind my back, and he is riding me fast and hard and he comes into me and i can finally relax.

and then he directs me – get down there and clean it off. “i want to feel my cock hit the back of your throat.” i do this til i’m retching and gagging and i rear off him. “once more.” “really?” i didn’t get a response, just him forcing my head down. so i do it again. gagging on the cum, on the strain, on the sensation. he releases me. i explode off again. “and again.” i catch my breath and go back again, deep throating him like crazy, feeling tears and cum mingling on my face, hoping this is going to end because i feel like a little slut and i am exhausted and i am totally at his beck and call. apparently this last time was enough. he pulls me to him and wraps his arms around me, protectively, lovingly. “sleep now, babygirl.” and i pass out.

it’s just sex, but it keeps me down there. this is – i’m pretty certain – not what “an equal relationship” looks like. this is, i’m fairly certain, what being a slave to my husband looks like. it’s hard work, mentally and physically, but the pleasure i get is so intense, and the wetness of my cunt any time he pulls me to him by grabbing my nipple – the knowing that i don’t have to try and make the right decision about my body any more, because he is going to use it just the way it’s supposed to be used – it doesn’t get any better than this. being owned. being controlled.

Vignettes

Tags

anal sex, butt plug, deep throat, fucking, gimp hood, humiliation, master/slave

Just a few little stories from the past few months.

… the morning when I woke up as he was connecting my shackles to the bedposts, and then he slipped on the hood and penis gag before I could sputter out a question. And then he informed me he was going to train my ass that morning. Starting with the smallest butt plug. 15 minutes for each size. We had about 6 at this point. All that happened, for those 90 minutes, was the insertion and removal of ass plugs. After each removal, he stretched my cheeks apart, and would do things like spit into my ass, push one and then two and three fingers in to see how stretched I was, and then he’d say things like “… you’re loving having anything in here, aren’t you … you love feeling your asshole gape for me …” After the 90 minutes, he released me, took off all toys, and after 5 min of deep throating him, he cheerfully swatted me on the ass and let me get on with my day.

… the night when he was in a foul mood after work, and he took it out on me. Every restraint possible, every sensory deprivation tool available, til I was totally pinioned and immobilised, spread wide and distended, and then lecturing me on my place, my role, and how much of a greedy slut I was, how much I craved being used and abused. Slapping me, pinching me, choking me. Then, fucking me so roughly, slamming into me like salvation lay deep within my body, and pulling out in time to coat my mound, cunt, and asshole with his cum. Throwing me in the shower, spraying me down like a dog, and then snuggling me on the couch while stroking my body softly, calmly, and making me wet all over again.

… the night where he woke me up and told me to go get a medium/large butt plug from the ensuite, put it in and come back to bed. When I returned, he had me lie on the bed on my back with my head hanging over the edge, and he fucked my face til I think he got down my throat, I was choking for sure. After he came, he got me up on my knees on the bed, gripped my neck til I couldn’t breathe, smacked me in the face a few times, and – I can never forget this – and he said in the quietest, calmest voice, “say thank you, cunt”. Gave me enough air so I could gasp out “Thank you, Master”. Then he let me go, and as I curled up in a shivering mess in bed, he held me until I fell asleep again.

midnight training session

Tags

anal sex, bdsm, control, deep throat, face fucking, humiliation, master/slave, oral sex, power, sex slave, submission

i’m calling it a training session – it’s my terminology, not his. i feel it describes it best.

i went to sleep at midnight, he stayed up and came to bed after i had gone to sleep. i pushed through layers of a dream to find his arms wrapped around me, stroking my slit softly with his fingers, and holding and squeezing my breasts with the other. i start to make little moans and happy sighs, snuggling into him and enjoying it. then he pulls me around to face him, grabs a fistful of my hair, and pulling me down, tugging on my nipple, pushing my head, he forces me down under the quilt. i know what’s going on here, i took his cock in my mouth right away and went to work. licking the shaft, sucking and sucking, throwing myself into it. it took a while longer than i thought it would, and then it just kept going. that point where i thought he’d pull me back up to fuck me. we passed it and he just held my head there, fucking my face and me gasping only the smallest breaths around the edges. 

i think this was the same style as the anal sex earlier in the week. being used not in many different interesting arousing ways, but focusing on one hole, and not giving me any space to think about anything else. i know i had no time to think. i was just focusing on breathing, and swallowing all the pre-cum that was seeping into my mouth. keeping my mouth stretched wide open, not biting, not gagging, letting his cock force its way down my throat as far as i could take it. i think this went on for about 15 minutes, which for me is forever. short attention span.

he pulled me back up. i was gasping, my face was covered in my own spit and his pre-cum, and i felt like a mess. i lay there gasping for air. he turned me around again, spooning me. “shhhhh” in my ear. “shhhhhhhhhhhhhh”. i try to get my breathing under control. “that’s enough, babygirl. quiet now.” he doesn’t even touch me, just holds me, lets me come back down to earth.

i’m finally calm, drifting off to sleep even. and he’s pulling me around again. pushing my head back under the covers.

time gets a bit hazy. it was rougher, i think, but maybe that’s because it was such a shock. i vacillated – i wanted to push him away, and get back to the fresh air, and to sleep. i wanted to do my duty and show him just how obedient i was. i wanted to get his cock into my cunt and feel more pleasure. he started fucking my face in earnest, grinding my face into his hair and his balls, twisting me around and kneeling over me, fucking down my throat as i lay on my back convulsing around his cock. probably not 15 min this time. probably less. i’m gagging by now, he pulls me up.

this is a headfuck moment, you know? i was furious, tbh. not furious. i was exhausted, and ready to refuse anything more. he held me, a bit tighter because i suspect he realised. “shhhhhh”. “deep breaths, babygirl.” i was tempted to let the hyperventilating continue, but i needed the oxygen and i listened to him as he told me how to breathe.

then he turned me around to face him, and i started flipping out. “no, no, i know i’m not supposed to say no, but i don’t want to, i really need to sleep.”

he let me rant for a while.

eventually i started to worry. i didn’t want to ruin everything, i just needed a break. 

he understood though. lots of cuddles, lots of hugs. and he gave me a choice. a third time down there, or the larger butt plug til the morning. 

you know that thing where you just can’t really decide because it’s not your decision to make? yeah, me too.

“whatever you want, master.”

pinching both nipples til i was gasping all over again. “get down there then and get my cock in your mouth.”

he was so big by now. he pulled me to him, held my head in position, and gently, slowly, guided his cock down to the back of my throat. then he just held me there, stroking my hair, every now and then adjusting slightly. i felt love from him, love and ownership and control and utter and total power. power i had given him.

he kept me down there for probably only 5 minutes. 5 minutes of me, lying still, mouth stretched open, his cock filling my mouth, me breathing carefully through my nose, feeling more precum seep into my mouth, down my throat. his hands protectively stroking my hair, but never giving me an inch to pull back.

me, giving up. 

then him, pulling me up. no words. turning me around to spoon me. guiding his cock into my ass. pulling me onto it gently but unrelentingly. me, giving it to him. letting him. no words. his cock, in my ass, not moving, just slowly growing soft as i fall asleep.

Close to non-consensual – reality

Tags

bdsm, butt plug, chastity, chastity belt, cunt, deep throat, Fuck, master/slave, non-consensual, oral sex, rough sex, spanking

So such a beautiful yet rough fucking on the way home from Xmas yesterday. And it’s the end of a long day, and to be honest, I’m feeling a bit exhausted. Not in the mood. I go to bed, and he follows soonafter. The routine kicks in – he gets into bed, I close my book, turn off the light, and present. Some very rough mauling signals that he plans to use me tonight (so far I don’t think there’s been a night he hasn’t). I struggle with this internally – I’m wet immediately, but I don’t want to give in. I tell him as much, that I’m not refusing him – I wouldn’t dream of it – but that something feels off for me.

He listens, understands, assures me he’s still going to use me anyway. I get wetter and start spooning back into him so his cock – rock hard and massive – is slipping between my dripping wet cunt lips. But I still don’t feel into it. But I’m gasping and bending and twisting trying to get his cock into me.

He pulls away, and gets a new butt plug, which goes in easily enough. Then he tells me he’s not going to fuck me. I beg him too – not just ask, we’re talking pleading, and “please Master” isn’t enough, I have to say it all, “please Master, I want you to fuck me, please put your cock in my cunt.”

He flips me on my stomach, and pounds into me, I’m still a bit sore and I don’t really want to do this, and I am grinding and bucking and getting as much of his cock into me, feeling my holes stuffed and stretched. I want to just go to sleep, I don’t want to be fucked, and I want more in me.

After we stopped, I tried to explain this, that I still felt strange, and that I wanted to feel down there again, which is how I describe being in slave headspace. Being down there. Held down there. His foot on my neck.

I beg him for the butt plug in overnight, and he gives it to me, and straps the chastity belt so tight that my cunt lips graze the outside and are cut into. I love it. He pulls me over his knee and spanks me, hard, and I collapse into him. He pinches and pulls my nipples, hard. I gasp with pleasure and pain. He has me give him head for quite a while; cock to the back of my throat, face fucked in that position, and then he presses my face into his balls, I can’t breathe, I’m  taking them in my mouth and he has me by the hair, and he masturbates until he cums.

By this point I’m pretty far down there. And he points out to me that no matter what I ask for from him (and he wants me to ask, so he knows how to take advantage of me), the fact that he just had my face rammed into his balls and a butt plug strapped into my ass, while he pleasured himself – this is proof that no matter what, I’m really just here for him.

I fell asleep quite peacefully after that. Collar on, butt plug in, chastity belt on. I was deep down there, and content.

where i end up begging for anal

Tags

anal sex, bdsm, begging, deep throat, master/slave, oral sex, sex slave

where we started off innocently enough, playing with new toys, the inflatable plug in my cunt, spreading me so wide that i was screaming into his hand. but it was all good, and he had his arms wrapped around me, and he was telling me sweet things, reminding me of my role, that i could scream but it wouldn’t help. innocent fun and games.

then he ripped the plug out and as i laid there gasping, his cock speared me and he had his hand around my throat and his finger in my mouth, he was tearing at my nipples, he was using me and i felt it. 

and this is all pretty par for the course, the part where a 9″ cock is ripping me open and i’m riding through the pain on his instructions, and then he pulled out and i got straight to work cleaning my juices off his cock with my tongue. he pushed my head down until his cock was as far down my throat as it could go. “can it go any farther?” he pointedly asked. i managed to get it past the gag reflex, and with both hands wrapped in my hair he kept me exactly there, as i flailed and bucked like i wasn’t loving being used like a fucktoy.

so this is normal i guess for me now. this is what i accept from my husband, this is what i deserve, and as a submissive female, this is what i need to keep me behaving and to make it clear to me that i am subservient to my master, to his cock, to his needs.

this is normal.

and then we lay there cuddling, and he asked me “should i fuck your ass?” i took a deep breath. a million things ran through my head. he’d do what he wanted anyway. but maybe he would take my concerns into account. but maybe he’d want to fuck me even more if he knew i didn’t want it. i took a guess. “no, but you’ll do what you want anyway.” i could hear the tone of my voice as it came out of my mouth – i sounded so young and timid. 

and then i surprised myself. i rolled over onto my stomach and spread my legs. i felt totally controlled and i knew i couldn’t escape. i may as well show him how good i was, how i wanted only to do the right thing, to obey and be praised. so i prepared myself for anal sex before i even knew if it was coming. and i hoped that maybe such obedience would mean he would spare me.

he didn’t. of course. he fucked me slowly and methodically, and every time i begged for a pause, he told me to push through the pain, and he pushed his cock further in. “i’m trying to relax!” i kept gasping out, but he didn’t give me the chance, he just kept on pushing his cock into my tight ass. i know it was tight because he was praising me as he went, telling me how good i felt and how much he liked fucking my ass.

need i say, this made me wet.

he used me like this for a while. then he pulled out and we spooned again. more cuddles, more reminding of my role. he told me i had earnt my collar, and put it on me. then we laid down and prepared for sleep, talking about how good it is to have our roles clear and a lifetime to put me in my place.

and i don’t know how it happened, but i asked him to fuck my ass again. and he told me to beg for it. 

so i did

i was grabbing at him, at his cock, his body, gasping out “please” over and over. “please fuck my ass, master, i want your cock in my ass, please please please”. 

this time it wasn’t slow and methodical. he kept reminding me to push through the pain, and also, that he liked my pain. and he got about 6″ into me, and then it began. this was not friendly and loving. this was me being used and abused, being forced to take far more cock, more pain, more humiliation. my face pushed into the pillow, then his hand gripping my hair and pulling my head up so i could hear my own tortured gasps for breath. then him slamming my face back into the pillow. all the while ploughing my ass like i was only here for his pleasure.

even wetter as i realised that’s all i was there for.

he pulled out, came on my back. showered me off, more stroking and tenderness, and he put me into bed, put my collar back on, and i fell asleep with an aching ass, and a happy heart.

last night

Tags

bdsm, bondage, butt plug, deep throat, headspace, master/slave, non-consensual, oral, oral sex, sex slave, training

he spooned me, stroked my nipples gently, and then within a minute or two his cock was down my throat. we’re doing a lot of head these last couple of days. i have always been good at it, but due to health issues i can’t do it as well as i used to. not as much staying power. i also am a small little girl, 5 foot tall and very slight, and he has a 9″ erect cock. i don’t swallow his cum, and i have a tendency to gag. this is now, entirely, changing. 

he’s training me – which is to say, he’s instructing me and i’m obeying him – to take his cock far, far down my throat. if it isn’t hitting the back of my throat, i’m not doing a good enough job. if i’m breathing, it’s not in far enough. he lies on his back, tells me to take his cock in my mouth, and i know what i’m supposed to do. i press my face down on it, wrapping my lips around and pressing my tongue against it. i take it like that, not breathing and just gently undulating my tongue against the shaft, until he tells me to start sucking, and my job is to pull back until it’s almost out, then plunge back down onto it til it hits the back of my throat. over and over again. sometimes he just grabs my hair, holds my head down there, and fucks my face while i gag, drool and choke. 

this is my role as his oral slave, and i’m doing it as well as i can, and he is approving of what i’m doing.

so last night we start with my oral training, and then he taped my arms and legs close to my body, lay me on my back, and fucked my cunt til i was bouncing off the bed and making some seriously intense sounds. he cut me loose, and instructed me immediately “go clean your cunt juices off my cock, slut”. i would never have done this before. now i went straight to work. 

he was so proud of me, i could tell by how he started finger fucking me and tickling my ass. the little things!

i was so far in the slave headspace, he had me present to him next to him in bed, and i stayed like that, panting heavily and dripping onto the bed. he talked to me in that quiet voice about how well my training is going, and how it will get heavier and more intense. how soon i’ll be swallowing his cum and begging for it. the headspace by now was so intense. he must have known, must have realised. he didn’t tell me to relax, he didn’t talk me down from the dangerous peak i was on. he just – quietly, sneakily – grabbed the very large butt plug – it must be 5″ wide – i’ve never been able to take it – he grabbed it and before i could register what was happening, he was steadily pushing it into my ass.

so i went crazy. as you do. i stopped short of saying “no”, so i said “it hurts!” over and over again. i cried. i screamed. he wouldn’t stop, and it inexorably pushed further and further into my by now stinging and burning ass. i reared up off all fours and tried to crawl to the edge of the bed. he wrapped a strong arm around my stomach, “no, you don’t get to stop, you’re taking this butt plug right now”, and he just kept pushing it in. apparently it was about 3/4 in. i was struggling and crying, but i was also obeying, in a very disobedient way. as punishment, i guess, he rammed it harder, pulled it out and rammed it in, enough to make me just collapse in tears, sagging in his arms. “mmmm, perfect, give in to me, whore”. so i did. i could feel my ass muscles relax, and the plug got closer and closer to ripping me open entirely.

eventually he pulled it out. i stayed in the “present” position, totally brutalised and dominated. i couldn’t move. he kept talking quietly to me about the changes in our relationship, and my role in our marriage. he was in my head, i have no defenses any more. then he told me to go to sleep. “how should i go to sleep?” i managed to blurt out. he knew what i meant. “on your back, legs spread wide, both hands on your cunt until you sleep.”

so that’s what i did. kneading my hairless, swollen, wet, sore cunt lips, stroking up and down my slit. legs splayed like a whore ready and waiting for him. touching, touching, touching, until i fell asleep.

the non consensual fantasy

Tags

anal, bdsm, bondage, butt plug, deep throat, fantasy, master/slave, oral, rape, restraints, slave

… where he wakes me up in the middle of the night with a hard and insistent cock between my lips … i take it willingly down my throat, but he starts face fucking me before i’ve had a chance to really come to terms with what’s going on … i try to show him i need to breathe, but he pushes the head of his cock down into my throat, and i start gagging around it, convulsing … he pulls out just long enough for me to think i’ll be able to breathe, and then back down my throat, pulling my hair so hard back that i can’t move, i can just feel his cock slide back down my tongue, my throat, and pre-cum ooze around the corners of my mouth … i’m on the verge of tears when he finally pulls out for good … i lie down exhausted, but he throws me on my stomach, fastens my wrists to the restraints, wraps the waist restraint around me and pulls it tight to pin me to the bed, spreads my ass cheeks, spits on my asshole, and when i try to turn around and beg for a breather, he slams my face down into the pillow, and with the other hand, pushes the large butt plug in … i am flailing now wildly, feeling the skin tear, but he ignores me, pushes my legs apart, lies down on top of me, and starts fucking me so hard … my face in the pillow, i can’t breathe or scream, he’s pushing so far up into me that i swear it’s just pain, no pleasure … the pressure of him on my back, his voice in my ear whispering to me that this is what i deserve, i’m just some holes for him to fuck, and that the more pain i feel, the better it feels for him … he lets me breathe briefly, and my ass is on fire, my cunt must be bleeding by now, and i’m pinioned, i can’t move, i can’t escape, and i just want to go back to sleep, and i manage to gasp out my safeword … and he pulls my hair so roughly, grabs a fistful of it and slams my face back into the pillow, pulls out the buttplug and rams his cock in there, plowing so hard that i am now screaming voiceless screams into the pillow, safewording over and over again, and he pulls out finally, cums on my back … i’m gasping finally, blessed relief, and he pushes the butt plug back in, pushes the largest dildo into my cunt, and the largest penis gag down my throat while i’m genuinely screaming now, yelling and screaming and crying … then it’s the chastity belt buckled tight and padlocked … then his voice again as he gazes into my eyes – this is ownership. this is what it means to be my slave. you really have no rights. none whatsoever. you are holes to be filled. and i get to use them and fill them however and whenever i want. 

… and i can feel my cunt growing warm and wet just listening to him. i am sobbing and hating him and hating my life, and i want nothing more than for this night to end, and yet to last forever. every hole is stretched, raped and torn, and i’m scared of the morning. and i love my master.